Thursday, March 29, 2018

The White Picket Fence Lie





The White Picket Fence Lie



Who lied to all of us mamas & sold us a bill of goods?!

Pardon my french, but that 'crap' isn't real...

Why was I told from the time I was little that being
a mom would be a never-ending magical moment
of Froot Loops & sugar dust?

& Why was I told that my spouse would meet all 
my needs & be my "Prince Charming" forever & ever amen?!

_____________________

Real parenting & marriage are hard work.

Like, take today for example.

After hours of running around after caring for my 3 littles in the morning,
I was so looking forward to a nap this aft. 

Even a little quiet lie down to refuel would have sufficed,
however, they were not having any of it.

I enforced some lie-down time for about an hour,
but by the end, I was feeling completely in knots
of trying to "force" something that obviously wasn't to be today.

We got up & I allowed some "Paw Patrol" while
completing some tasks at hand.

The fatigue hit me hard, and I admit (ashamedly) that I lashed
out at my hubby via text about some issues that had been stewing.

That didn't go very well as he was having his own
'bout of problems at work. Sigh.

Later, after the TV was turned off, I attempted
story time, which was turned down & instead forts were made
(fantastic!). 

That solace lasted a short while before I found
my youngest literally eating half of the dog food bowl.

Oh, shoot! I forgot to hide the dog dishes after rest time.

Toddler was munching happily and screeched when I wrestled the bowl 
from his pudgy clenched hands...

Kids continued running around the house, & I felt defeated
about when was I going to get around to my next task.

____________________

That is hardly an example of an extremely difficult day,
but it does constitute the flow of many of them.

Morning = High Expectations 

Afternoon = Fatigue & (Usually) Disillusioned In Some Form

Evening = Counting Down To BedTime

Repeat.


Lately, I've been contemplating the whole idea of marriage & parenting 
in a much deeper fashion than usual...

Why do we perpetuate the idea to young people that it's easy and picturesque?
  & that all the gushy feelings will come each & every. single. day.

That you'll always swoon over your loved ones??

That something is drastically wrong with you & your family
if you don't love every single moment that you're with them?

You may say, well we want to set the next generation up with great expectancy for 
the future relationships they'll (hopefully) be granted.

But I say a big NO to that. 

I say teach them the truth:
that in these beautiful God-ordained relationships you WILL need
to buck up & press through! 

That you need to count your every blessing,
& though you will have many, 
it will be required of you to practice the discipline of 
doing things that don't always "feel" good.

That you are signing up for one of the greatest callings
you could have ever signed up for.

But with a great calling comes much work.

Whether you work inside or outside the home, you are a parent...
you are a spouse...
you are a loved one within your family. 

That great relationships take work.

That work requires time.

That time itself is no longer your own.

That yes, balance is a must, but you need to see yourself
in the trenches of a most holy calling.

The calling that is literally preparing the future 
descendants that are yet to be...

This calling is destined to impact people, more than you can imagine.

That for good, or bad, your words, your choices
will set an example for those who reside in the four walls of your home.

_________________________


Children and spouses do have this little thing called free will.

They will use it accordingly, and at no time do we have minions that
do our every bidding. Scoff.

But we do wield this one powerful word: Influence!!!

Influence gives us the chance
to put before our children ALL that we have to offer:
whether that be our skill set, opportunities we can provide,
and of course, the example of our attitudes.

Healthy influence also allows us to invest beneficially in ourselves
so that we can pour of our overflow back to them.

With each example we impart, whether good or bad, it gives them 
the choice to embrace it or not.


Our Impartation + Other Influences In Their Lives + Their Choices  = Their Character





_______________________


Only a few moments ago I stopped writing to
cradle our screaming (hysterically) 2-year-old in my arms.

He stopped.

Lil guy had come home from an outing with Dad,
however, he had fallen asleep in the car.

Being abruptly woken up had started the fuss,
but the snuggling calmed him 100 percent.

Then, our 4-year-old daughter came up to us, looked at me first 
before starting to stroke her younger brother's head in affection.

She asked him if he was okay.

& my heart sang.


______________________


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